I Am Sorry
For every other 10 years olds, going to school is a punishment, but for Rishav, school is his escape just like that house. Yeah it’s true that his school like any other school comes with teachers, responsibilities of homework, fear of exams and doing good in exams and all these aspects of school doesn’t really make it a best hiding place but it’s a hiding place nonetheless. And anything or anyplace that keeps his away from looking at her mother loving his half-siblings more than him, or his stepfather, his mother, and his half siblings being a team and realising that he belong there – Rishav likes it!
And that is why he is always the first one to reach his class among his classmates. He is the first one to feel the silence and quiet before this place becomes a fish market. So imagine his surprise when he sees a black and green robotic rucksack already in the classroom and that too on his seat – the second last bench on window side.
Whoever this person is, has a really cool choice in choosing backpacks, Rishav thinks impressed. But then frowns thinking that this person is also the person who has tried to take his favourite seat away from him. With eyes narrowed, he looks at the bag and decides that this person must be new because everyone in this class know that this particular seat is his.
With still slightly bitter on losing the house he picks the new bag up and put it carefully on the seat ahead of his. And then with satisfied smile on his success, sits on his seat. Even though he is no nerd, he likes to come and sit in he class before anyone else. To absorb this beautiful view of open playground surrounded with large trees, to absorb this beautiful silence, to absorb everything without sharing it with anyone. And he is so glad that whoever this new kid is, isn’t in the classroom to steal this moment from him or even have a small share in it. He want to share it with anyone, not even with Ankan.
Some 20 minutes later whole class starts getting filled with his classmates and their loud voices. His friends all greet him in their way, some giving him high-fives, some hitting his shoulders with their fists etc.
He sees the kid who usually sit one seat ahead of him entering the class talking to his friends. And as soon as he looks at the bag he throws it carelessly on last seat of the class, just behind him. Rishav grimaces and opens his mouth to tell him to handle the bag carefully but then shuts it thinking it’s nine of his business.
Still his eyes were stuck on door in hope of seeing his new classmate who owns this bag, so that Rishav could at least apologize to that person and help him/ her with finding a good seat and good seat mate.
“Hey Rishav” Ankan comes to Rishav’s desk after putting his own bag at first seat. They both bump their fists in a way of greeting. “Lets go to assembly, ok? Otherwise I will have to write your name on punishment list” As the class monitor it’s Ankan’s duty to see if everyone is in assembly or not and write the name of absent kids on punishment list and as a good friend he doesn’t want to write name of any of his friends.
After assembly, Rishav comes to classroom and look directly at the last bench of class, in the hope of seeing the new owner with ye cool bag but neither does he see the bag he any new face but there is something new on the last desk – his bag! And then he let his eyes travel to the seat he regularly sits on. Then he found her, Khanak with brand new uniform, her tie perfectly tied, her hair in a pony, sitting in his seat, looking outside through the window – at the view he want to share with anyone with her cool bag. His new neighbour is also his new classmate!
“She is the new kid!” Rishav exclaims out loud, making all his friends stop their conversation and follow his gaze.
“Oh god!” He wonders what problem does Ankan has with her then remembers their failed prank on her. “Rishav!” Ankan calls his name urgently as if asking what are they going to do if anyone in school come to know about how badly they failed in their prank; all their reputation of being cool will be gone. But then Rishav remembers that their faces were covered in this of powder and she really recognized them.
“Do not worry, our faces were hidden” Rishav Whispers in Ankan’s ear. And moves toward Khanak to confront her for taking his seat with nervous Ankan just behind him.
“What are you doing on my seat?” He asks angrily.
“I have kept my bag on this seat before you this morning so for today this seat is mine” She replies back. Her voice sweet but tone matching his own.
“This is my seat, I sit here everyday” He tells her frustrated.
“But sir told me to choose whichever seat I like and he also told me that there is no fixed seat. Whoever comes first gets the seat everyday”
He opens his mouth to reply that there is fixed seat and its fixed that this seat is his but just then their class teacher comes, with attendance register in his hand and a permanent smile on his face.
Every student rushes toward their respective seats except Rishav.
“Rishav, go to your seat” The teacher instructs.
“But Sir, she is sitting on my seat” Rishav whines.
“No Sir, I was the one who kept my bag on this seat first this morning and he even threw my new bag on very carelessly on the last bench” Khanak complains, emphasizing on threw and new bag. Rishav starts to deny that he threw her bag but the guy who did starts shaking his head and pleading Rishav with his eyes to not say anything. Rishav shuts his mouth.
“Rishav, was her bag already in the seat when you came?” Teacher asks.
“Sir but I sit here every day” Rishav again whines.
“Was it?” Teacher asks very sternly this time.
“Yes Sir” Rishav mutters in a very low voice.
“Then you go sit on the last seat and Khanak will sit here only! And as punishment to give your new classmate a bad welcome, you can’t sit on this seat for this whole week, ok?” Teacher orders to which he nods his head. “And as a reward for not lying when I asked, you will this seat will be your fixed seat for next two weeks, ok?” Teacher smiles kindly at him.
“Ok class now it’s time for attendance” Teacher announces while Rishav goes to the last bench, scowling at Khanak.
“Why? Why can’t something that’s mine always stays mine?” Rishav wonders and scowls at the pretty girls sitting ahead of him. “First house and then this seat!”
“She want to sit there, right? I will irritate her so much she, herself will stop wanting to sit on that seat” Rishav plans in his head and begins with kicking her foot under the table. When she looks at him, he very innocently apologizes.
Whole day Rishav kept doing one thing or another to irritate her, poking her with pencil, pulling her hair, kicking her foot etc. and every time pretends to be honest. By the end of the day he could see the frustrated frown on her face – he didn’t like it. And the fact that he is the reason behind the frown on that pretty face he disliked it even worse.
He once more pulled her hair making her look at him with so much anger.
“I am sorry” He apologizes, this time genuinely. But Khanak narrows her eyes trying to find out whether he is really apologetic or not.
“I didn’t throw your bag!” He confesses trying to clean the slate.
“I am also sorry for doing that ghost prank on you yesterday” On that she gives him a small smile.
“It was sweet and interesting” She replies, still doubtful.
“We were not to be sweet!” Rishav hears from beside him and realizes that everyone has left and Ankan has come to stand beside him. Khanak looks at Ankan with curiosity trying to figure out what he has just muttered.
“Anyway lets not tell anyone about that prank, okay?” Rishav asks Khanak and she smiles sweetly.
“I will not! It will be our secret” Khanak promises while looking at Rishav and raises her hand to shake and not even for a millisecond he thought of Cooties before shaking her hand. After all some girls especially ones with sweet smiles are worth sharing Cooties. Rishav shakes it nodding his head, Ankan also puts his both hands covering their hands.
“And mine too!” Ankan exclaims with excitement making Rishav and Khanak laugh.
Three of them starts to pack their bags to leave the classroom for the day when Rishav says “cool bag!”
“It is right? My Papa got it for me” She replies with a sad smile. And Rishav realizes that she knows that her father is never coming back, it’s just that she is not ready to accept it.
Next week when Khanak came, she kept her bag on last bench as per teacher’s instructions and went to assembly hall but after she came from assembly her bag was back on the seat she has been sitting on for last one week – Rishav’s favourite.
Rishav was looking from the door and the smile on her face after she saw her bag on his favourite seat- he liked it. And the fact that he is the reason behind that smile – he liked it even more.
Rishav still likes to come before everyone even if he knows that he will have to share the silence with Khanak and Khanak ‘s chatter but he doesn’t mind because now he comes early just to enjoy looking at her and her chatter without having to share it with anyone else.